Pooped

Grocery store – spent $15, lunch – spent $5. Ross, TJ Maxx – spent $0. Post Office – spent postage for four envelopes.

I’m wiped out – spent. But I keep coming back. I feel like I’ll come back from this. I hope I’m done with surgeries at least for a bit. Thankful for a comfy bed and a heated, big, soft, fluffy blanket to melt into and warm my icy feet. Yes, icy. My eyelids are heavy and my back hurts. What is this crazy joy that gives me hope? Some kind of inner peace that is absolutely convinced that things are all going along as planned? Just not my plan. A greater plan that will produce a greater joy than what I planned. I don’t think it’s delerious exhaustion causing faulty perceptions. Somehow it’s all going to be okay. I believe I’ve sunken deeper into the bedding. Content and trusting for now

Tomorrow I might rage. But tonight I rest.